Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
