Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
