I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
