I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
