Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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