So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
