After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
