It's just like the Real World with babies
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
