Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
