He is such a slut. More and more my type.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
