i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
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