Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
