Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
