It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
