I hope mine doesn't look like that
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
