I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Randomize
