I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize