Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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