Pants 0. Shit 1.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I FOUND THE LEGS
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Randomize
