saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
He better not be in your backpack
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
