just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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