I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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