There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Randomize
