McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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