It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
