Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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