Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
