Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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