I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Randomize
