yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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