Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
