I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
