but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize
