I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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