Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
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