let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
