Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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