im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
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