Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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