Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
