That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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