I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
