you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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