Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
