Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Randomize
