how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
