Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize