the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize