I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
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