haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
